"Useless"

(Daily Express)

  "Cape Fear"

"Roo-boo-zela blows his top."

"Never in the field of World Cup conflict has so little been offered

by so few to say many (with apologies to Winston Churchill)."

(The Sun)

"Cape Clowns"

"England's flops are no longer fit to wear the shirt."

(Daily Mirror)

Goalless. Guileless. Graceless.

"Last night England were the nation's collective worst nightmare, a

sleepwalking shambles who are now third in group C and must face

 up to the prospect of World Cup elimination."

(Independent)

Hang your head

(Daily Mail)

"The side may now be galvanised by fear, but unless the excitement of the

World Cup itself permeates mind and body there can only be

a limp towards nondescript failure."

(The Guardian)
 

"After the most tedious 90 minutes of the tournament it might be

best for the beautiful game if England are put out of their misery

 as soon as possible."

(Daily Record)
 

Match 25: NETHERLANDS v JAPAN

Date: SAT 19Jun10

Venue: Durban DURBAN STADIUM

PANDO! or GORDO? GORDO?

+ You know how it is > You flirt with a co-worker (or anyone you see regularly), exchange gifts, glances, innuendos and then they show up at a company function with their significant other carrying on like rabbits .. ..

> I reckon it’s called ‘being exposed’ .. .. Everything is rosy until you are on the big stage when it matters, then the truth rears it’s ugly head .. ..

Countries like ALGERIA & JAPAN have proved (again) that if you have a mobile, quick defence with just a hint of counterattack ability & scrapiness, you can stay in a match that you have no business being in .. ..

That sums up the first 45 minutes of the day when the NETHERLANDS held most of the possession, but JPN was just scrappy enough, and quick enough, to frustrate NED a bit and make them work for everything .. ..

A clash of former colonial allies, NED finally broke through with a pile-driver by WESLEY SNEIJDER who at the top of the box crushed a right-footer that went through GK KAWASHIMA’s hands for the only score he needed .. .. But, of course we are all jealous of who he scores with at home (see MoM) .. ..

In the end it was a handy win for NED and they never had to get out of second gear against a JPN side that just didn’t have the quality in the attack to really trouble NED > Case in point, they had a golden chance to draw the match in the 90^th minute but the chance in the box went high .. ..

NED MoM: WESLEY SNEIJDER &

Creative genius at Inter Milan scored here and at home with Yolanthe Cabau van Kasbergen – the smoking Spanish/Dutch daughter who is a top soap star back in Holland and the couple is considered the #1 celebrity hookup in the country .. ..

JPN MoM: none

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Match 24: GHANA v AUSTRALIA

Date: SAT 19Jun10

Venue: Rustenburg ROYAL BAFOKENG STADIUM

PANDO! or GORDO? PANDO!

+ As we get deeper into the Festival, more football truths are re-emphasized like GOALKEEPING > You absolutely need quality, experienced goalkeeping in the ultimate tournament .. ..

AUSTRALIA became the recipient of GHANA’s lack of the latter when RICHARD KINGSON made a complete ‘Gordo’ of a FK that hit him right in the chest and BRETT HOLMAN was right there to turn it in with his L/Foot .. ..

Perhaps this is the residue of a very casual, relaxed GHA side that didn’t come out with the vitality that they did in their opener .. .. Underestimated AUS perhaps?

GHA came back into the match when poor HARRY KEWELL got an unlucky, but deserved RC for a handball on the post > A hard shot clearly found Kewell’s arm, not his shoulder or side, but his arm while guarding the left post and got run off despite not knowing what hit him .. .. Just not the Socceroo’s tournament .. ..

ASAMOAH GYAN then dispatched the PK hard > L/Right with SCHWARZER heading the wrong way .. ..

AUS huffed and puffed and took advantage of very sloppy Ghanaian passing to threaten a bit but just couldn’t put a quality chance on net .. ..

Fair play to AUS > They tried hard but the talent was just not there to equalize (like JPN) and GHA played with little urgency and a draw was all that was deserved, but it sure looks like GHA has more to give .. ..

GHA MoM: ASAMOAH GYAN

French-based striker again the scorer for Ghana, was lively throughout and was always creating chances for himself and others .. ..

AUS MoM: BRETT HOLMAN

Signed by Feyenoord-NED aged just 17 and now at AZ-NED, the 26YO put himself in a great spot after the botched FK and finished calmly! Ran himself into the pitch!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Match 26: CAMEROON v DENMARK

Date: SAT 19Jun10

Venue: Pretoria LOFTUS VERSFELD STADIUM

PANDO! or GORDO? GORDO?

+ MI CASA > SU CASA? C’mon now, not in the World Cup!

If you’re gonna give the ball away, at least do it in their third and not your third of the pitch > Charity beings @ home, but c’mon .. ..

What are we complaining about, it was fun to watch though, wasn’t it? But, the match was far too loose and open .. ..

CAMEROON started the scoring when CHRISTIAN POULSEN practically gave away the ball with a lazy []-ball and ball finally found it’s way to SAMUEL ETO’O in M/Box and slotted it home .. ..

But the Danes struck back with the BEST GOAL OF THE TOURNAMENT thus far >

Star defender SIMON KJAER hit a perfect ball from the center to a streaking DENNIS ROMMEDAHL along the right who crossed the ball perfectly to a streaking NICKLAS BENDTNER in L/Box and just tapped it home to equalize .. .. SUPERB!

And, since CMR refused to defend, ROMMEDAHL raided down the R/Flank, cut back and then curled a L/Footer into the U/Left to send CMR out of the festival .. ..

CMR MoM: SAMUEL ETO’O

Mercurial striker rammed home the goal he couldn’t miss but otherwise was ineffective as was the rest of the CMR attack .. .. The Captain of the National side is three-time African Footballer of the Year my be making his swansong for his nation in CMR’s last WC match .. ..

DEN MoM: DENNIS ROMMEDAHL

31YO winger still has world-class speed and easily got behind the CMR defence and had a hand in both WC goals .. .. .